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View Vaibhav Jain’s graphic link
I think we got marriage wrong.

It used to be the foundation
You married, and then built life from scratch.

The mess, the risks, the growth
You carried them together.

Now it’s treated like a trophy.

First prove yourself alone..
Career, travel, solo apartment, dating life.
Only once you’ve “arrived,” you earn the right to marry.

But here’s the crack in that logic:
By the time you’ve built this perfectly independent life, you’re also perfectly alone in it.

And two self-sufficient people don’t suddenly know how to be vulnerable together.

That’s why marriages today feel fragile.
We expect them to be polished, conflict-free, Instagram-ready from day one.

But marriage was never meant to be the prize at the end of adulthood.

It was meant to be the training ground for it.


View Nilanjana Sengupta’s graphic link

Nilanjana Sengupta • 1st

A seasoned HR professional who loves to blend her outlook on interplay of human emotions with her creative pursuit of writing bilingually,has a published book Serendipitous Me & a Podcast channel Chai Date on Spotify
Marriage is companionship
Two people with shared values ideas and belief systems coming together to jointly build a life better than what they could have done alone
The idea of marriage to be ideal from the start is a wrong notion that society at large is conditioned with
View Gargee .’s graphic link

Gargee . • 2nd

Coaching people to STAND OUT and not FIT IN || Mindset Transformation Coach | NLP | Trauma Regression Therapist | Executive Coaching | Keynote Speaker || Ex-MMT || Ex-Smartworks || Ex-RateGain
Or we can look at it little differently. Self sufficient, financially independent and knowing for sure what you want from your partner is what happens now. I feel by the time you become a trophy man or woman, you are whole and complete and only look for a partner who will compliment you, build on companionship and grow from there on (the growing never stops).
There is a huge risk is starting from scratch and growing together... What if both grow but in different direction!
View Vaibhav Jain’s graphic link

Vaibhav Jain Author

Special Forces Instructor | Life Coach | Fractional CHRO | 2x Operator
(edited)
Gargee . Nicely articulated...

I think our perception that perfection and full compatibility must exist from the start is part of the issue. In our ignorance we often love with so much intensity at the beginning, without realizing real growth comes from building together. I believe more than anything, you grow with a person. The foundation has to be there, along with respect for each other’s independence, but the evolution of the union is where the beauty lies. After all it’s the journey that matters most.

And growing in two different directions doesn't mean both can't co-exist and complement...this is not YIN and YANG, where you complete me..it's just you see me, that's more than enough.
View Gargee .’s graphic link

Gargee . • 2nd

Coaching people to STAND OUT and not FIT IN || Mindset Transformation Coach | NLP | Trauma Regression Therapist | Executive Coaching | Keynote Speaker || Ex-MMT || Ex-Smartworks || Ex-RateGain
Vaibhav J. This is getting very interesting. Actually, there is no black and white, right and wrong. It is only your truth vs my truth when it comes to relationships. I am no relationship guru honestly, but i do see the importance of being complete in yourself first rather than finding a partner to complete you. You got to see and know your own scars and wounds before you bring that to the table expecting your partner to heal you from it.
I think that's what brings in compatibility and perfection, when you are complete and whole yourself. The YIN and YANg balance has to be within, not outside. Then if you grow in different directions, you can co-exist, otherwise that is a big challenge.
View Dewan Mohamed’s open to work graphic link

Dewan Mohamed • 2nd

BI & Data Analytics Consultant
Gargee . But when we talk to most of parents and grandparents generation about their most memorable moments they never say how they bought their 2nd home or buying their 2nd car which was luxury one or moments that improvised from luxury to ultra luxury rather they cherish the moments that they crossed the struggle zone to comfort zone together, the bond that is built from scratch is incomparable whereas the bond will always be fragile when they start from comfort zone as they have never accomplished anything as first together to cherish rather they just accomplished a luxury version of something they already made alone before marriage
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Gargee . • 2nd

Coaching people to STAND OUT and not FIT IN || Mindset Transformation Coach | NLP | Trauma Regression Therapist | Executive Coaching | Keynote Speaker || Ex-MMT || Ex-Smartworks || Ex-RateGain
Dewan Mohamed that's always the case. But you are probably referring to materialistic luxury. I am referring to growing from a mindset pov where you are complete in your life on your own because you have healed from all your conditionings. For example, women don't need a man to show her worth. Or men don't a woman who makes him believe he can be loved with all his flaws. She knows she is worthy and he knows he is loveable without each other because they because that's dealing with your wounds and showing up for each other complete.

Then you build memories and achieve milestones together and that's so beautiful.
View Amanda Sodhi’s graphic link

Amanda Sodhi • 2nd

Indian-American Content Writer, Strategist & Digital Marketing Consultant with 19 Years of Experience. I Also Conduct Creative Writing Wellness Workshops. Founder @ Pen Paper Dreams.
Marriage was meant to be the training ground for adulthood? For whose benefit exactly? Sorry, but if you compare unmarried men vs unmarried women in India who live away from home, it's the men who tend to struggle with adulting vs the women. The "training ground" is only to the man's benefit. Most women ARE pre-trained. The "training ground" metaphor only works if you assume both partners are equally unprepared, which is rarely the case. Women’s unpaid labor, resilience, and early conditioning get erased when people generalize marriage as a universal school for adulthood.
View Saurabh Parmar’s graphic link

Saurabh Parmar • 2nd

Fractional CMO 🧠 (17+ yrs) : Brand, Digital,Growth & AI ➕ Ex-founder-2 Startups 🚀 ➕ Taught @ IIMC, ISB etc + Corporates & Govt bodies -Focus on AI, GTM ,Marketing & Crisis Comm Workshops 🎯
(edited)
Vaibhav J. Marriages failed because you have to write this on the LinkedIn platform, a place which recognizes not honesty, ethics,openness as parameters but network, fame and money.

A culture which is built on the latter. vs the former will also always produce unhappy humans who are searching for more,
We are never enough, we have impostor syndrome, 'we want to be more' because we think we are less, where growth means to be financially succesful, have fame, be fit...but rarely happy and good human beings first.

How can unhappy humans be happy together? Our goal posts are skewed,not the process.
View Prakhar P.’s graphic link

Prakhar P. • 2nd

Exploring the playbooks of startups, work & life - and sharing what actually works!
Marriage can't be ideal from the start. Otherwise how will the 2 people grow together as one cohesive unit? The idea that let's become perfect first and then unite is in itself flawed to begin with!
View Priyanka P.’s graphic link

Priyanka P. • 2nd

L&D Strategist | Internal Capability Building | Leadership & Onboarding Programs | Learning Strategy & Curriculum Design | Open to Full-Time & Contract Roles
This framing feels a bit too neat. Earlier generations didn’t always get to ‘build together’ on equal footing. One partner usually carried more of the risks. And independence before marriage isn’t the enemy, it can actually strengthen the partnership. The real challenge isn’t whether you built life solo or together from scratch, it’s whether you know how to practice intimacy, negotiation, and shared goals once you’re in it.
View Priyanka P.’s graphic link

Priyanka P. • 2nd

L&D Strategist | Internal Capability Building | Leadership & Onboarding Programs | Learning Strategy & Curriculum Design | Open to Full-Time & Contract Roles
Vaibhav J. I'm a bit conflicted here. While I understand what you're saying, I can't unsee that growing together earlier often meant one person gave up more, which wasn’t exactly ideal. People grew apart a lot, but they still stayed in unfulfilling marriages.

I think when we say it's harder to merge lives at a later stage, the underlying assumption is that independence makes you rigid. But it doesn’t always. Independence can also make you more open. At that point, marriage isn’t about meeting a norm, it’s about actively choosing it. And by then you usually know that the most honest kind of growth comes when two people already know themselves, and still decide to keep evolving side by side.
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Khushal Sahni • 2nd

SDE 2 @ Urban Company | System Design, Scalability, Node.js, TypeScript | IIT BHU '22 | Petrolhead 🏎️💨
Interesting take, probably somewhere lies the balance in it, you shouldn't marry too early, you barely know yourself, you shouldn't marry too late because as you said, we stabilise over time and I've felt this in myself, the more stable you are the less likely you are to form connections, be vulnerable, need someone, almost like an inert gas
Marriage or not, relationship in itself should be about companionship, living and building together, naturally after some years if it leads to marriage that's good
Obviously in India its all split, the relationships are formed with different conditons and marriage is formed with different conditions almost like we are all following some broken playbook
View Deepak Punwani’s graphic link

Deepak Punwani • 2nd

Entrepreneurship | Higher education - including MBA admissions | Career planning
Interesting. Allow me to share a different perspective ~ when one is ready to defer to the larger goal of the unit (in this case, the couple and family) over one's own individual goals - then it's the right time to marry. For some, this spirit of teamwork is ingrained at 21. Some evolve into it in their late 20's or early 30's. Some burn their fingers and then discover this secret in their late 30's and early 40's. And some still search for this formula well into their 50's. Don't marry till you can't conceive how helping someone reach their goal may be even more joyful than reaching your own. Don't get me wrong, one could aspire to be head of state or launch a billion $ company as one's goal. But the day you realize that offering a tailwind to someone else's goals will earn you more respect in your own eyes ~ than whatever you achieve for yourself ~ you are perfect marriage material.
View Deepak Punwani’s graphic link

Deepak Punwani • 2nd

Entrepreneurship | Higher education - including MBA admissions | Career planning
ha ha Vaibhav J., indeed. In fact, teamwork is a spectrum and not a discrete point. So, absolutely - the fun is in figuring this out together. But if one is rowing together, at least the bow has to be pointed in the same direction. So, by all means, figure out teamwork together as you grow. But then, at least have that as one of the couple's goals to start with; otherwise, both will be rowing in opposite directions, and their boat goes nowhere. A stationary boat sinks first in a tidal wave :)
View Ashish Gupta’s graphic link

Ashish Gupta • 2nd

Founder - Fintech Platforms - Turning dreams into reality using AI, ML, Algos, Analytics, Blockchain (Bootstrapped)
Marriage, means locked with one person for life? Thats definitely wrong. I am glad it’s not working out, it was never meant to work out this way. Not in the current economic setup where instant success and instant gratification are the norm. Where money and fame are the only yardsticks. Who is interested in decency, moral values and family togetherness in such an environment. Let’s see how society will eventually solve this problem, it’s not going to happen anytime soon. Something major has to shift for clarity to emerge but being locked with one person for life was never the right thing. Thats for sure.
View Sukhvinder Singh’s graphic link

Sukhvinder Singh • 2nd

P&L | Sales & Ops | Business Development | Procurement | Channel Management | Project Management | ex-Shell, B.P.C.L,Nayara Energy
Nice perspective Vaibhav, IMO marriages now operate more like strategic partnerships. both partners share goals, contribute professionally and domestically, and negotiate responsibilities rather than split roles by default. thoughtful communication during key transitions like starting a joint life, mid-career shifts, or later-stage changes is what makes such unions resilient .
View Vishakha Sharma’s graphic link

Vishakha Sharma • 2nd

Amazon Advertising- Beauty & CPG | Retail Media | Scaled top FMCG brands on Amazon via Ads | Digital Marketing | MDI Gurgaon | CAT VARC 100%tiler | ex Tata Steel
(edited)
I don't think previous marriages were romantic in any way whatsoever. There was a lot of loneliness inspite of being a couple and the strain and lack of support wasnt even recognized. There was no concept of emotional connection. People were married as kids or young adults and then conformed to gendered societal roles. Just because it lasted to conform to social reasons, doesn't mean the people were happy and doesnt make them better. Also one can have a partner in their self and career building journey without being married to them right at the start. Most successful people have very good boyfriends or girlfriends who they marry later. Marriage requires responsibility as well and not marrying like kids. And most people feel ready to take it once they are more settled. Not knowing how to be vulnerable is a first world problem by those standards. Also in today's world anyone someone marrying very young is likely to feel they missed fishing the sea and cheat on their spouses . Have seen enough examples. One should marry when they have the maturity to handle it.
View Aalap Gandhi’s graphic link

Aalap Gandhi • 2nd

Marketer by heart, Driving change by profession | Diageo | Dainik Bhaskar | Future Generali | Axis Bank
Profound, Vaibhav J.

This made me reflect on an insight I once heard from a self-made entrepreneur: Entrepreneurship isn’t about escaping the 9-to-5, or holidaying at will. It demands structure, accountability, and often, even more discipline than a conventional job.

Isn’t marriage strikingly similar? It isn’t about the financial freedom you achieved before—or how autonomously you chased happiness earlier in life. Rather, marriage is about envisioning a shared future, defining mutual goals, and building not just a roof above your heads—but a home filled with purpose, partnership, and belonging.

To borrow your energy, Vaibhav: I think we got marriage wrong when we treated it as a destination rather than a journey—and one that calls for intention, effort, and shared dreams rather than surrendering to convenience.

A marriage rich in discipline, empathy, and purpose isn’t less romantic—it’s more real. And achieving that, I’d argue, is the peak of adulthood!
View Sheel J.’s graphic link

Sheel J. • 2nd

I help kids master future skills — fun for them, stress-free for parents | Ex-Amazon | Product Leader
A slightly diff pov:

Early marriage for woman had many flaws.. financially dependent (prone to abuse), fully dedicated to household & expected to support husband kn his career from day 1.. early childbirth, etc etc.

Getting the time to mature as an independent person, is way better. It gives women the much needed time to choose their life partner, as well as voice to speak-up for their rights.
View Balasree V.’s graphic link

Balasree V. • 2nd

Improviser | ex-VC | Mechanical Engineer | Theatre-maker | Travelling Artist | Performer | Multipotentialite
This is such a silly take.
Marriages feel fragile today because women have other options. And thank goodness for that!
View Divyanshu Singh’s graphic link

Divyanshu Singh • 2nd

AI | Product | Marketing | Analytics | IndianOil | IIT Madras
(edited)
Interesting take, I am scared to see how the number of marriages going bad have increased in recent times, is it even safe to get married now?
View Harsh Swaminarayan’s graphic link

Harsh Swaminarayan • 2nd

Helping urban Indian millennials live mission-driven, fulfilled lives | Full-time parent | Coached and recruited 100+ working for a Decade at 321
Vaibhav J. Was lucky to experience the former version ❤️ put so well!

Ayushmaan Kapoor you will resonate with this i think! 🙃
View Vivek Kaushik’s graphic link

Vivek Kaushik • 2nd

8x MS Azure Certified | Full-stack | Web | Cloud | AI
Two words - Natural Selection.

Blame wamen 😂. Gone are the days of "Trophy wives", now are the days of "Trophy Husbands".

30L is the new 12 LPA.
View Dr Meghna- The Therapist Mommy’s graphic link

Dr Meghna- The Therapist Mommy • 2nd

I empower couples to thrive through stronger partnerships & parenting | Clinical Psychologist (RCI) | Founder & CEO, Raising Family Academy™ & Partners to Parents | Pioneering couples therapy training in India
Traditional marriages were built on women’s financial dependence, which often meant silence, not strength.
Today’s version risks the opposite....too much independence, not enough vulnerability.

The real work is weaving two lives that are both strong and interdependent.
That’s not a badge. That’s the hard-earned skill of partnership
View Radhika Khattar’s graphic link

Radhika Khattar • 2nd

Recognition, Culture & Wellness Strategist | Talent Advisor | Founder, MyWellSpace
Interesting post — I’m not agreeing or disagreeing, just sharing my lens.
 1. We are all born free souls, though many of us lack the courage to live that way — we tie ourselves down.
 2. Marriage is both a social construct and an institution. At its best, it’s also an experiment in two free souls learning to co-live. Most struggle with it… until they decide it’s simply too expensive or too lonely to separate.
 3. For me, marriage isn’t a prize. It’s a conscious choice between two people — and only time reveals how they truly live, grow, and function, both as individuals and as a unit.
View Deboleena P.’s graphic link

Deboleena P. • 3rd+

Empowering Strategic Decisions | Business Research | Market Intelligence | Competitive Insights for C-Suite
“You married, and then built life from scratch.”
But historically, that was true mostly for the woman.
She moved into a new home, adapted to a new family, built new social circles—often while being financially and socially dependent on her husband. The husband, meanwhile, usually stayed rooted in his existing life.
Now, both partners are expected to adjust, compromise, and build together. And suddenly, marriage feels harder. Maybe it’s not that marriage is failing—maybe it’s that we’re finally asking both people to show up equally. And that takes a different kind of strength.
View Jibran Khan’s graphic link

Jibran Khan • 2nd

TalentDryft ⚡ | 27K+ | Building Elite Tech Teams | Open Roles -: Principal Data Engineers | Sr./Lead Back-End (NodeJs) | ETL Testing Pros | Sr. Backend (Ruby)💫
and a way to extract money from male partner, irrespective of the fact that he is earning or not....
View Sahin Sarkar’s graphic link

Sahin Sarkar • 2nd

Tech Lead at Ixigo || "Friendly neighbourhood software engineer" || Investor/trader || Writer || Business Enthusiast || Philosopher || ex-Deutsche Telekom Digital Labs || ex- Bharti Airtel || NSIT '16
(edited)
Jibran K 🚀 no it's not. The problem is that "WE" made it that way.

This has been a permanent problem with law, it has a word and a spirit. The problem has always been that people follow the word of the law, but never the spirit.

This leads to all kinds of problems and crimes in the world
View Dewan Mohamed’s open to work graphic link

Dewan Mohamed • 2nd

BI & Data Analytics Consultant
True. Even I advise the same to many of my junior colleagues. I got married at 23 and we have built it from scratch going through all ups and downs which built a unbreakable bond, but this generation are afraid of seeing downs with their life partner which will never build the bond between them, without bond it's always fragile
View Shubhangini Dimri’s graphic link

Shubhangini Dimri • 2nd

Mental Health advocate | Counseling Psychologist | UGC-NET (24-25) and GATE 2025 (XH- Psychology)
Well I do agree with quite a few things here, but we often tend to glamorise things of the past. Like how people were “better, hard working, more respectful” in the past.
There always were all kinds of people then, and there are all kinds of people even now. Same goes for marriage.
Similarly, there were all kinds of marriages then, and there are all kinds of marriages even now. Just because people used to live together (especially because they didn’t have any choice) doesn’t mean their marriages were better, stronger, foundational or built from scratch. They were transactional, more or less, and nothing much has changed since.
The difference is “the choice” that people have now, of living together, walking away, walking alone, or getting into a transactional relationship.
It was trophy that people would flaunt and seek and nothing major has changed in that respect. People just are more Vocal and Aware.

I think the important factors still remain the same, to build a life together: you have to open your heart, build space for another person, and need to have mutual respect. Foundations never change, it’s the outlook that has changed. We are able to see the fractures that were ALWAYS there. Maybe they can be finally undone!
View Smriti Walia’s graphic link

Smriti Walia • 2nd

Business Development & Sales Leader | Driving Growth, Client Success & Strong Teams
Marriage is a partnership, or it has to be a partnership. Two people coming together with some shared values, some ideas and then building a life together. They may not think or approach life in the same way, but they make it work, they both adjust, remould, grow together and independently too. All this takes time and work and effort but no one wants to do that in today's world of instant gratification!
Nothing worthwhile was ever easy, but somehow we expect it to be and aren't willing to do the work, cuz that's hard and it might include some self reflection too !
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Divya Raviraj • 2nd

The EQ Coach||🌿 Building my dream Product in the mental Well-being Space | Agile& EQ Expert | Teaching emotional Intelligence with 8 years of coaching experience| 💡 100+ lives transformed | 🏢 Coach for corporate teams
Marriage does not mean you need to find a perfect partner...

There is no one in the world who is perfect

Instead of "Perfect partner", one can look for " willing partner "
a partner who is willing to put the effort to become a better version of themselves

a partner who is willing to nourish the relationship.

a partner who is willing to respect and understand each other differences, love languages etc.

Willingness is more important than perfection
View Neha Bawse’s open to work graphic link

Neha Bawse • 3rd+

CMA,CA Final, AIR-33(CA PCCE)AIR-73(ICWA inter)
If marriages happen early..chances are two people didn't know their goals and what they want to fall for wrong choices and when one achieves and later didnt..the crack definitely comes and it's not always about career or financial goals...when two people of similar wavelength or achievers met they know the value, mature enough and have know the importance of conflict solving and standing for themselves....two people who grow together are rare....it's jst myth that if 2 people are achievers they can't be vulnerable.. vulnerability comes from emotions not from the years of togetherness...There may be couples who are married for like 30-40 years and still cannot share basic emotions with each other....some people stay married doesn't define marriage is good...n Divorces never say that two people who are achievers loose it...it's just they accepted boldly that it's not to be continued...only being in marriage doesn't define marriages are good and people in them are happy...
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Dinesh Govind • 2nd

Strategic Fashion Retail Consultant |Driving Category Growth, Sourcing,Buying,Retail,Merchandising P&L Scale1000Crs |Founder@ Vastra-Sastra.com |Trusted advisor to Global Brands LCWAIKIKI,PUMA Ex- Reliance,Raymond,Redtag
(edited)
If you are seeking happiness in marriage chances are like 1/1Mn . So instead work on your passions, Wealth, Health ,Happiness in doing what you love . And happiness does not come from others or outside it's an inside job. I'm helping Men Attain Mental Health Mastery through Quantum Physics Energy Fields. DM for details.
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Urmi Bhattacharjee • 2nd

Founder Signature Voice Co-Founder Sacred Polarity | Ex NDTV Journalist|Ex EY Senior Consultant|Sustainability Supporter| Former RJ| Professional Speaker
The mess the grind etc is nothing but what Bollywood glorified in the name of love. In reality, it leads to bitterness. Also, men have often used those women, their love and comfort in the building up stage only to leave them and run for a younger more prettier one when they make their money. Love is always a scam to make women settle for less. Also, no man who loves a woman would willingly want to drag her into his misery. He builds his structure first then welcomes her. In exceptional cases, when such messy relationships thrive, it is because women have more miserable lives in their own paternal homes or they are not educated enough to provide themselves a better life, or in extreme rare cases there is a great masculine vision and direction worth supporting like in the case of Pankaj Tripathi , the actor, whose wife supported him during his trying days and both ended up happy. I have see many women guilt tripped into settling with a half baked man only to be dominated and disturbed in the marriage.
View Vinayak Pandey’s graphic link

Vinayak Pandey • 2nd

Senior DevOps Engineer specializing in Cloud Computing
In marriage, many people walk around with an empty glass,they expect their partner to fill them with love, care, happiness, and fulfillment. At the same time, they assume their partner will always carry a full jug,unlimited patience, energy, and affection to pour into their glass.
A strong marriage happens when both bring their own jug partly filled with self-love, emotional stability, and effort and then pour into each other.
View Dhillan Chandramowli’s graphic link

Dhillan Chandramowli • 2nd

Pop culturing heart disease. Storyteller | Audio person | Rock Climber
I think we need to understand that marriage, like anything else, changes with the times.

It used to be clear gender roles
It used to be the middle class cosplaying the rich

It used to be mess, risks, and a life that...you were locked into. While 'what ifs' quietly circulated in your head.

Then, financial freedom arrived. Choice arrived. What ifs started having their day.

Some enjoyed it, for others it worked out differently.

The idea that simply...enduring...a marriage is valuable, is largely built on the absence of choice.

Not always as noble as nostalgia would make it seem. Marriage is just meant to be whatever the two people involved want it to mean.

I understand your argument about people not having 'relationship resilience'. Let me raise you one. Do you think it's always a valuable quality to cultivate?
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Ipsita Ray • 2nd

Life Coach & HR consulting - Former Head HR -Business, with TCS , Abbott, L&T Infotech
I think it is a healthy environment which now at least provides the option to people (both genders) to be successful and to choose either solitude/self sufficiency or marriage.

Marriage is not enforced as mandatory now - as it was enforced earlier. And it should not be - marriage or solitude should clearly be a choice.

Earlier these mandatory marriages - at least more than 60% of them were toxic in some way shape or form (both genders) - at least this environment clearly values the individual as a whole and complete self first - which is really crucial and foundational.

In Europe - almost 40-60% people choose to live in solitude and the rest choose to marry . We are seeing similar choices in South Korea as they prosper economically in the last 1-2 decades. Single households by choice have risen significantly.
View Amrutha V.’s graphic link

Amrutha V. • 2nd

Lead Sales Trainer - Metropolis Healthcare Limited
Interesting perspective, but I see it differently.
Historically, marriage was less about being a “training ground” and more about strategic partnership and alliance for wealth, land, families, influence. And marriage can means different things to different people. For some, it’s about building life from scratch; for others, it’s about first proving themselves individually and then seeking partnership. Neither approach is inherently right or wrong.

In my view, marriages feel fragile not because of when or how they begin, but because one or both partners aren’t ready to do the real work—on themselves, on each other, and on the challenges that come along the way.

There’s no single formula for a successful marriage. What matters is the willingness to grow together.
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Susovan Dwivedy • 2nd

Management Consultant @ Infosys Consulting || CSPO || Ex-Deloitte, Capgemini || XIMB
I think the author misses the nuances of Indian Marriages and why is it moving towards the way it is.

Earlier, marriages were like roulette - you had no idea who you were locked in for life - especially women - who had to build from scratch and due to societal norms had to stay put in unhappy and miserable marriages. Younger marriages meant lack of maturity from both partners to actually manage life and that led to more conflicts.

Dont mistake longevity or so called journey that you say into believing that those were happier.

Just do a quick survey of women in your family in the previous generation or even before that - ask them questions such as - what their dreams were? You will get a sad lonely answer - buried in society, kids and duty to husband/family.

The reason marriages are evolving now is to move to a more fulfilling happier construct where you KNOW exactly what you are getting into and with your choice. And the ability to get out of it if it fails and not be miserable your entire life.

It is infact building cooperation when it is harder and thus will be more stronger in the long run.

Hope you follow up with a more nuanced take rather than whitewashing younger/miserable marriages.
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Manish Badani, PhD • 2nd

RETIRED (R&D and Intellectual Property Professional)
I agree that something has changed around marriage especially in the educated urban class. People are “analyzing” various aspects including double income, education, location, etc. Now it is more common to hear about divorce within our “circle”. But irrespective of how much anybody plans, life always takes unexpected turns and I am not sure if the “Analysts” are prepared for that.
Comment image, no alternative text available
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Hansen Vas • 2nd

Performance, Rewards, and Analytics @ Jio Financial Services | Ex STL
(edited)
Let it be. It indirectly contributes towards an overall reduced population in the long run anyways (Need it here while taking care not to become a Japan/Korea in this regard), plus talking about Indian laws with respect to marriage and inheritance, we need to have it gender neutral asap!

Also, while we are at it, it's best to champion partners' compatibility. Building life to the lifestyle you desire from scratch while single has its own perks.
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Kashyap Mandavia • 3rd+

Associate Test Lead /Functional Testing Selenium Java| API-Soap and Rest Assured |Agile| Azure Pipeline Integration| CI CD integration ! Github
(edited)
How did we know it was working smoothly before ..we only know the outcome from survival..Did we know the different hardships was faced by them or pressures with society norms or able to express themselves without any second thought.. if you are not happy you have to resolve it or get moving life is to live and move on ..not being locked
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Richa Taneja • 2nd

Content Marketer | Brand Storyteller | Social Media & Digital Growth Strategist | Helping Brands Build Presence with Impactful Ideas Making Brands Impossible to Ignore, Through Powerful Content & Digital Strategies
This is such a powerful reflection. I think you’re absolutely right marriage used to be the foundation where two people learned, struggled, and grew together. Today, it often feels like the ‘final reward’ after building a perfectly curated, independent life.

But the institution of marriage itself has evolved. Earlier, it was more about survival and social structure. Families, finances, even societal acceptance were tied into it. Today, it’s about choice, companionship, and shared values. That’s a positive change, but it also means we enter marriage with higher expectations, less tolerance for imperfection, and sometimes less practice at vulnerability.

Maybe the sweet spot lies somewhere in between: entering marriage with enough independence to stand strong, but with the humility to grow, compromise, and build together. After all, marriage isn’t meant to be flawless from day one, it’s meant to be the ground where flaws can be nurtured into strength.

Most importantly people have forgotten that it's you water me I water you. No human can be 100% all the time.
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Saad Shaikh • 2nd

Founder & Principal Consultant at Enovo | Registered Patent Agent (India) | Patent Drafting & Strategy Expert | Helping Innovators & IP Firms with Patent Filing, Searches & Prosecution
Marriage was about building lives together. Today, its about assembling together already built lives.

I got married at 22, while wifey was 21; I think it worked out well for us. Gave us a chance to actually build a life together before we were exposed to other options that the world has to offer. The life we have is the only life we know, and we are quite satisfied with what we do have. Worked out quite well for us. Were we lucky? May be. 😊
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Anirudh J • 2nd

....bohemian mais mon âme appartient à Praha.
(edited)
That is absolutely wrong....The best marriages are ones where both are perfectly ok separate but they only stay for love.....NOT for co-dependency.......If you want an equal companion to love, live and laugh with, not a therapist or a fellow struggler....It is best to go through life's struggles alone and reserve the best for your partner....That way, if your life partner is dishing out crap, you get to leave immediately.....and vice versa....
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